The Top 10 Ways to Keep Passion in
Your Relationship

All long-term relationships go through a variety of phases.  There is the initial dating and courtship and infatuation period.  If the relationship continues, it settles into a more stable time of building a history as a couple.  If children enter the picture, that is a new phase.  Later, there is another phase of being together as a mature couple with the wisdom of experience.

We all know that it is possible to keep passion, romance, excitement and sexual intensity alive through the years, but we also know that many relationships settle into a kind of friendly (or not so friendly) roommate situation.   Every relationship has it’s ups and downs, but there are tools that can keep passion perking right along.  Here are 10 of them:

1. Be kind.  I’m writing this on a cruise ship and it’s fascinating to watch people grouch at their spouses, then turn around and share a friendly smile with a stranger.  We tend to take family and best friends for granted.  A smile, a wink, just a moment of kindness goes a long way.
   
   
2. Be attentive.  Paying attention to the details of life is important.  Pick up your own trash, and pick up for each other.  Put things away, help each other with the small projects around the house.   These things are the currency of love.
   
   
3. Be gracious.  Small surprises can create huge rewards in a relationship.  I think of it as the "Martha Stewart Effect".  Taking a moment to put on a clean shirt before dinner, or using the good china, or cutting a flower from the garden and putting it on the table, are examples.   All these things add color, spice, and graciousness to our lives.
   
   
4. Be patient.  We all have bad days.  It happens.  When it happens to your spouse, be smart!  Take the kids to the park for an hour, order Chinese take-out for dinner.  Give him/her a break!   This is the reality of life.  Allow for it.
   
   
5. Be honest.  Tell the truth about your feelings, and do it promptly and in a respectful, effective way.  Share your disappointments and fears, but also share dreams, hopes, and gratitudes.  Keeping secrets kills passion.
   
   
6. Be funny!  Life seems to have supply its own stress and worry, but we have to provide the humor on our own.  Share a joke, take time to tickle each other or rent a funny movie, and do it often.  The couple that laughs together, often does other fun stuff together, too!
   
   
7. Be flexible.  Over a lifetime, people change.  Hopefully, your relationship will change and grow and mature with as you change.  One of you will change careers, the other will change religions.   One will have an illness, the other will make a mistake.  Relationships either bend and flex with the winds of life, or they break.
   
   
8. Be generous.  I’ve saved the best for last.  After a survey of dozens of couples, the big 3 items that showed up over and over began with "give little gifts".  Surprise each other with flowers, candy, a card, or other gift.  Do it often.  Do it for no particular reason.  Do it because you love each other and thought it would be nice to show it with a gift.
   
   
9. Be available.  The second of the "big 3" was "take time for each other".  Schedule time to walk and talk, go for drives in the country, go to dinner and see a movie together.   Dozens of couples ranked time together as the most critical component in keeping romance and passion alive.
   
   
10. Be physical.  This is about sensuality perhaps more than sexuality.  Couples talked about the importance of scents, of candles and flowers and walks on the beach.  They talked about making love, but mostly they talked about back rubs and holding hands, and creating memories.   They talked about getting dressed up and going out, and they talked about skinny-dipping.  They talked about being playful and finding their own way.  You can do this!

Someone has said, "Life is what happens while you were making other plans."  Romance is about real life, not about dreams and fantasies of the perfect partner, someday on a Pacific island.  Romance and passion are about taking time to enjoy the company of the person you love.  Have fun.   Do it today!

Phil, Mary, and the Staff at
Resources for Success!

More tips: Click Here

Sensible Diet Tips

Start your diet with a food diary, record everything you eat, what you were doing at the time, and how you felt. That tells you about yourself, your temptation, the emotional states that encourage you to snack and may help you lose once you see how much you eat.

Instead of eating the forbidden piece of candy, brush your teeth. If you're about to cheat, allow yourself a treat, then eat only half a bite and throw the other half away. When hunger hits, wait 10 minutes before eating and see if it passes. Set attainable goals. Don't say, "I want to lose 50 pounds." Say, "I want to lose 5 pounds a month." Get enough sleep but not too much. Try to avoid sugar. Highly sweetened foods tend to make you crave more.

Drink six to eight glasses of water a day. Water itself helps cut down on water retention because it acts as a diuretic. Taken before meals, it dulls the appetite by giving you that "full feeling." Diet with a buddy. Support groups are important, and caring people can help one another succeed. Start your own, even with just one other person.

Substitute activity for eating. When the cravings hit, go to the "Y" or health club if possible; or dust, or walk around the block. This is especially helpful if you eat out of anger.

If the pie on the counter is just too great a temptation and you don't want to throw it away, freeze it. If you're a late-night eater, have a carbohydrate, such as a slice of bread of a cracker, before bedtime to cut down on cravings. Keep an orange slice or a glass of water by your bed to quiet the hunger pangs that wake you up.

If you use food as a reward, establish a new reward system. Buy yourself a non-edible reward. Write down everything you eat - - everything - including what you taste when you cook. If you monitor what you eat, you can't go off your diet.

Weigh yourself once a week at the same time. Your weight fluctuates constantly and you can weigh more at night than you did in the morning, a downer if you stuck to your diet all day. Make dining an event. East from your own special plate, on your own special placemat, and borrow the Japanese art of food arranging to make your meal, no matter how meager, look lovely. This is a trick that helps chronic over-eaters and bingers pay attention to their food instead of consuming it unconsciously.

Don't shop when you're hungry. You'll only buy more fattening food. Avoid finger foods that are easy to eat in large amounts. Avoid consuming large quantities of fattening liquids, which are so easy to overdo. And this includes alcoholic beverages. Keep plenty of crunchy foods like raw vegetables and air-popped fat-free popcorn on hand. They're high in fiber, satisfying and filling. Leave something on your plate, even if you are a charter member of the Clean The Plate Club. It's a good sign that you can stop eating when you want to, not just when your plate is empty.

Lose weight for yourself, not to please your husband, your parents or your friends. Make the kitchen off-limits at any time other than mealtime. Always eat at the table, never in front of the TV set or with the radio on. Concentrate on eating every mouthful slowly and savoring each morsel. Chew everything from 10 to 20 times and count! Never skip meals.

Submitted by Joe R.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Left Brain | Right Brain | Fun & Exercise | Spiritual | Home | Contact Crystal bowls
Tuning Forks | Products | Research | Contest | Parenting | Gamble | Shoppingcart | Unicycles